A friend messaged me the other day. I saw it. I didn’t reply. A week later, I finally responded with the classic: Sorry for the late reply, just got to this.

She called me out. You didn’t just get to this, she said. I saw the double ticks.

Damn. She was right. I’d opened it. I’d registered it. But I’d also shelved it. It needed a proper reply, and at that moment, I wasn’t equipped.

Maybe it got lost between revisiting pictures from 2016 and the reminder I set to cancel my Nibble app 7-day trial on day 6. Maybe I got a call? Perhaps I’d wanted to sink back into that Substack article about reclaiming attention, ironically while still on social media. Maybe I was working one of the four jobs I need to survive under capitalism’s boot heel. Maybe I was doing nothing?

Does free time now equal availability?

I get a ping from the family group chat, which doubles as an IT helpdesk for my mum. My best friend just FaceTimed me about a White Lotus episode, and another left a voice note crying about a possible diagnosis. All this, lodged between videos of cats and genocide.

The boundaries between reception and response have collapsed.

  • Lvxferre [he/him]@mander.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    edit-2
    2 days ago

    If the technical boundary collapsed, put a human-made boundary in its place. You have the right to have some peace of mind and quiet; make yourself unavailable for at least a good chunk of the day, and make sure your folks know you’re unavailable. And why.

    That’s how I remain sane.

      • Lvxferre [he/him]@mander.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        14 hours ago

        Ooooo, look at mr. “I’m sane” over here!

        I am sane. I SWEAR I AM SANE! /me grabs the kitchen knife CAN’T YOU SEE IT? I’M SANER THAN EVERYONE ELSE HERE!!!

        [I couldn’t help but play along with the joke, sorry.]